Little Mister Paul

Here’s my story:

I’m 57 years old and I work hard as a grocery clerk, go to the local community college and at times I barely seem to have enough time to concentrate on the things that are important in life. I have a spouse and two children.

At the local community college, I am studying to get an Associate’s Degree of Applied Science, Cisco Certified Network Professional. I entered the program through the State of Michigan’s No Worker Left Behind Program. At the moment I feel like I am walking into the edge of the dark and lonely woods. At the present time, I am at the point financially where a huge portion of American families have been or are at the present moment; I am losing my home that we live in. The Sheriff’s auction of the home our family lives in is scheduled for April 21. I have one large financial mess to deal with. I feel like “Little Miss, down on love” and at the same time I want to say, “I’ll get tough and don’t worry about me anymore”

With regards to my lovely wife and two children, I keep telling myself that I am moving along. I’ve turned my arms to someone new on several occasions, thinking that I am not loved at home. But, ”I can’t seem to fool this fool”, “wishing I didn’t love”, them anymore. However, with every step I take keeps “just circles back” to that same door”. “I’ve seen days alone in my own room”, but, “sometimes it’s gotta be” them. “What I’d give” to have them say, “I love you”.

So, you are wondering why I find the music of Sugarland so important in my life. Why do the words that Jennifer and Kristian sing in refrains bring importance to me and my life? More importantly, why do the words of Little Miss stand out as important to me personally? That’s a tall request to fill. I need to explain that I have been listening to country music for the last 17 years. I’ve listened to many artist and groups that have come along and many are country standards like Johnny Cash, The Judd’s, Dolly Parton, and Randy Travis, Alan Jackson and so many more. However, the one group I keep turning to on a daily basis at work and at home is Sugarland.

So to answer the question, why is” Little Miss” important to me is it offers hope. Even though I’m in “one big mess”, I know that “you sometimes gotta lose ‘til you win. Yes, losing your home is heartbreaking and stressful. After listening to the words you come away knowing that “it’s alright” and there are things you can control and there are things you can’t. This one of those that you can’t control and “it’ll be alright again”, it’s only an object (the house) that you are losing. More than ever, I’ll never rest, I have a degree and certification to finish and this will bring better things in the near future and as my classmates tell me, “you’ll go far”.

So you are wondering about the wife and children. Well, I know that I am loved. I have done wrong, I have failed them in some respects but it’ll be alright. It’s time for a brand new start and I’ll do my part and my heart is open to love and all things great and small and I am ready for love. I realize that I am okay, and it’s alright.

So to everyone at the Little Miss Project and all those that have taken the time to read this I wish you much love, hope and prosperity. Thank you allowing me to share my story.

Peace, Love and Happiness find its way into your heart.
Paul Wieczkowski

Sent two weeks later:

Here’s an update:

Hi Erica and to all those visiting the LMP site.

By the time this gets posted April 21 will have come and gone. As I cannot afford to file for bankruptcy at the moment to save the house, I had to make a tough decision to let it go. On top of it all work has reduced the number of hours that I work. So, I’m in one big mess.

It’s alright,
It’s alright,

The lyrics keep echoing through my head that we will be ok. If it wasn’t for the music and the support of friends, I don’t know where I would be. Inanity seems to be closing in and dragging me to the darkness.

Sometimes you gotta lose ‘til you win.

But, I’m holding my own and looking forward to graduation (May 13). I’ll at least have accomplished one goal. Graduating from college is a big step for me. It’s only taken me, 30 plus years to accomplish.

My friends, John and Jason, who are my classmate, good friends, are a few people that I share coursework with. Both of them keep telling me that big things are in my life. John keeps telling me that I’m the smart one. I keep reminding John that he has all the knowledge. He has answers for all the hard problems and I seem to be just skating along and not getting the work done. I have two other friends, Keith and Darlene. Both them are struggling with their coursework in two separate classes. As much support as I receive from John and Jason, I turn around and support Keith and Darlene and help them out the best I can. Darlene was about to drop her last two courses, but I was able to convince her to stay the course and at least accomplish one of her classes.

I’m alright.

All, I can tell you is that because of school, I have developed relationships that are supportive and nurturing. We all have that common goal of education. It is driving us to completion. If it wasn’t for this common thread, I would have given up long ago.

So, the words to Little Miss do ring loud and clear.

We are OK!
It’s gonna be OK!

The one thing I want to say to all you out there is that we are a community of people from all differenet walks of life. Whether you are young or old, we all have and share one thing in common that bounds us together. It’s the music of Jennifer and Kristian (aka Sugarland). Rejoice in their music and let it “Shine the light”. It will drive us past our problems and lead us to a better and happier solution.

Thanks for listening!

Love to you all,
Paul Wieczkowski

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