Little Miss Kayla

After finding strength and comfort in Sugarland’s music, Kayla has been able to rise above an eating disorder that she has been struggling with. “Little Miss” and many other Sugarland songs have been anthemic for Kayla as she has regained hope. Thank you for opening up your heart and sharing your story, Kayla. You are loved, indeed.

About six years ago, I began restricting my food intake, and in turn developed anorexia. I didn’t know how to ask for help; I was alone and scared. I was a freshman in high school. I found solace in listening to Sugarland’s music, to which I felt I always could relate. Three years later, I was scared my boyfriend at the time (now my fiance) was going to leave me if I didn’t kick the eating disorder habits. Driving home from his house I listened to “Fall Into Me” and was immediately crying. I had listened to the song many times before, but this was the first time it affected me on such a deep level. I knew I had to get over the eating disorder. Instead of asking for help (I had already been in therapy and quit because my therapist wanted to talk about my dad rather than me; also doctors told me I wasn’t thin enough to have a real eating disorder), I turned to my boyfriend. Since I hadn’t addressed the real issues, I began covering them up, and stuffing them deep down inside. I began drinking a lot, and also worrying about my boyfriend, scared he was going to cheat on me or leave me. This went on for 2 more years. I still listened to Sugarland everyday because I felt so much comfort in their music. This year, the beginning of my sophomore year of college, my eating disorder habits began sneaking back up on me. I turned to a friend who told me I needed to get help, but I was scared. I was scared to open up and make myself vulnerable. I had hid everything for so long, being as held together as possible on the outside. I eventually stepped way outside of my comfort zone and took a chance and went back to therapy with a different therapist. Around this time, I received my copy of Incredible Machine in the mail. I put it in my computer and began to listen and immediately felt that connection again. “Stand Up” has been such a strong inspiration on days when I feel down, it helps me know “Change is Coming.” “Find the Beat Again” has been a great song to listen to on days when giving up and not trying anymore feels easier. And last, but certainly not least, “Little Miss” has pretty much been my anthem song off of the album. I didn’t know how to open up and ask for help because I hadn’t ever really thought I deserved to. I was one to hide my scars; who I was, I didn’t like talking about to anyone. I didn’t like being vulnerable or transparent and it was slowly killing me. Listening to this album has helped me so much through my recovery. After 6 years of dealing with this on and off again, I finally have reached a point where I am not afraid to take the risk to kick this. I know I can do it, and I slowly am getting over it. My bad days are fewer and farther between. I am working towards my goal weight, and eating enough everyday. I am able to exercise without feeling like I have to in order to control my weight, I do it to be healthy. I couldn’t have gotten where I am today without the support I feel from Sugarland’s music. I want to thank Sugarland so much for how much they have helped me. I want them to know how deeply they have touched my life; and not just mine, but so many others as well. Every time I hear a Sugarland song come on, I feel better. Concerts are even more moving. I have met Sugarland once before, about 7 years ago, but I would love to meet them again, and plan to try to do that someday so I can personally thank them for what they have done in my life.

“It’ll be alright again…”

Thank you so much Sugarland,

Kayla

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2 thoughts on “Little Miss Kayla

  1. My sister struggled with an eating disorder from her junior year of high school all the way through college and even a few years after that. She was so small that we didn’t know if she would be able to have children. She got married two years ago to a wonderful man who makes sure she stays on track and doesn’t regress. They have a 6 month old son, Jack who is in my eyes the most beautiful human being in this world. She had to fight long and hard to not fall back into that destructive pattern. Thank you, Kayla, for sharing your story, you are truly inspirational. Stay strong, It’ll be alright again.
    ❤ liz

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